It's one thing to set a goal; it's another thing to follow through and achieve it—and this is where many people find themselves getting stuck. Even with the best of intentions and a sincere effort, many people feel as if they're up against a wall as they pursue their goals. The inability to reach a desired goal can be frustrating and disheartening. It can lead to a loss of confidence, even causing you to shrink back from pursuing other goals in future. But what if the problem isn't you? What if the problem isn't some inherent shortcoming you possess, but rather you simply haven't found the right approach for pursuing your goal? The right approach can make all the difference between success and failure. Consider someone who signs up for swimming lessons, while also suffering from extreme anxiety due to a near-drowning experience as a child. This individual will naturally need adequate time, patience and support to gain confidence around the water. Just stepping into the pool and standing in the water may be uncomfortable at first. For this person, working with an inexperienced or impatient swim instructor could make matters worse. Instead of progressing and gaining skills, the person may become even more tense in the water. Rather than feeling hopeful and optimistic about learning how to swim, the goal may seem further out of reach than before. Now, contrast that scenario with the following: the individual receives lessons from an experienced instructor who is trained to work with people who are afraid of water. Along with being patient and slowing down the pace, this instructor knows how to employ specific strategies to increase someone's comfort level in the water. As a result, the person is able to relax, have fun, and gradually gain confidence. All of that anxiety begins to dissipate, and learning to swim goes from being a terrifying experience to an enjoyable one. Whether it's learning to swim, trying to overcome a bad habit, picking up a new skill, or anything else, having the right approach matters—it can make all the difference between success and failure. Left unchecked, insecurity can take root and self-doubt can grow. On the other hand, continuing to invest time and effort is of little benefit when you're clinging to an ineffective approach. Even worse, your sense of agency—the belief that you can consciously and deliberately effect change through your actions—may take a hit. Left unchecked, insecurity can take root and self-doubt can grow. The more you blame yourself, the more you lose confidence and spiral downwards. This is neither a healthy nor happy state to be in. If you've been working on something or pursuing a goal without success, you may be at a point where you're feeling discouraged and disheartened. You may find yourself losing confidence, questioning your abilities, and perhaps even asking yourself, "Why bother trying? What's the use?" Don't throw in the towel just yet! Consider that you may simply need a different approach. Recognize your needs, leverage your strengths. Seek out new tools, input, methods, and means of support that recognize your needs and leverage your strengths. This one change may be just what you need to turn things around and get the results you want. Image Credit: Angela Marks from Pixabay Comments are closed.
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